Comic Transcript
JIM WASHINGTON: A new update for the Apple iPhone causes controversy as it is revealed that applying the patch to a phone that has been modified to work with wireless companies other than AT&T — the only wireless company in the United States authorized to use the phone on their network — renders the phone nonfunctional.
JIM WASHINGTON: With me in the studio today is Apple spokesman Steve the Paperclip. Steve, how does Apple respond to the uproar surrounding this latest action.
STEVE THE PAPERCLIP: Well, Jim, it’s a tempest in a teapot really.
STEVE THE PAPERCLIP: You have to keep in mind that the iPhone was designed for a specific purpose, and designed to be used FOR that purpose. When people attempt to repurpose it for other things, it harms the image of the iPhone overall.
STEVE THE PAPERCLIP: Buying an iPhone is sort of like buying a Jaguar. A Jaguar is a status symbol, and someone who owns one is laying claim to that symbol. Would you take a Jaguar, jack up the suspension, and add mud flaps and a rollbar and try to drive it offroad?
JIM WASHINGTON: Well…
STEVE THE PAPERCLIP: If you say anything other than “what a horrible thing to do to a car” I shall brand you a Philistine.
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