Uniqque News Bulletin

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Comic Transcript

JIM WASHINGTON: … and this is the Evening News. Tonight we learn that Uniqque, a software company specializing in network management and server software, and which also sells and distributes a distribution of Linux that is popular in the Corporate market, has entered into an historic business arrangement with long-time rival Ubersoft…

JIM WASHINGTON: The deal, portions of which have not been fully disclosed, involves Uniqque receiving what is officially being described as “a huge amount of cash” and the ability to virtualize the Ubersoft operating system in the Linux environment, as well as a pledge from Ubersoft not to “sue any Uniqque customers for using Linux, and also not to sue their children, their children’s children, their children’s children’s children, their children’s children’s children’s children, their children’s children’s children’s children’s children, or even their children’s children’s children’s children’s children’s children.”

JIM WASHINGTON: It is currently unknown what Uniqque will be required to give Ubersoft in return, but independent experts speculate that their children’s children’s children’s children’s children’s children’s children may be involved.

NEWS TICKERTAPE: Breaking: Ubersoft patents use of vowels in electronic news tickertape : SCLM NWS wll stp usng vwls n lctrnc nws tckrtp n dvc frm lgl cncl: Brsft clms —

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