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CUSTOMER: I just saw an article on your support website where you guys are now claiming that all computer problems are no longer your fault, but are in fact Intel’s. What’s that about?
ALEX: New research conducted by Sun has determined that computers are lousy at math.
CUSTOMER: What does that have to do with anything?
ALEX: Well, computers use math a lot. And poor math can lead to lockups and general system instability, among other things.
CUSTOMER: So when I’m in UberWordSoftPro and I want to search for and replace a word in an 800 page document, and UberWordSoftPro locks up on me…
ALEX: … The program is fine, it’s because computers are lousy at math.
CUSTOMER: And when I’m trying to generate a table of contents for that same 800 page document, and suddenly my entire desktop crashes…
ALEX: … The desktop is actually fine, the problem is it’s trying to recover from an error generated by the computer, because it’s lousy at math.
CUSTOMER: And when I try to save that 800 page document using another file format, and instead it emails the entire directory I stored the document in to everyone in my email address book?
ALEX: That might be a problem with a third-party printer driver.