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THE BOSS: I was drawn here by the sweet scent of fear mingled with soul-crushing agony and despair. What are you, creature, and why do you seem so familiar?
JINGLES, THE CHEERFUL NOTIFICATION BELL: I’m Jingles, the Cheerful Google Notification Bell! Binky is my daddy!
THE BOSS: There are three entities that might claim that name: one has been transformed into a sophisticated office supplement and is a prominent spokesman for Apple. One is a childlike creature whose manufactured innocence makes him a poor candidate for procreation. One is an embittered alcoholic, haunted by a legacy of poor and impulsive decisions…
THE BOSS: Ah yes. I see.