JIM WASHINGTON: We have a late-breaking announcement concerning the SCO v. Uniqque Unix copyright trial.
JIM WASHINGTON: A jury has found that Uniqque legally owns the copyright to the Unix operating system, and that SCO’s claims to the contrary are without merit.
JIM WASHINGTON: This is a great victory for Linux users and other advocates of Open Source,” a Uniqque spokesman said. “This is a travesty of justice, another sad example of activist juries run amok,” a SCO spokesman claimed.
JIM WASHINGTON: The brawl that followed will be aired on our eleven o’clock broadcast.
NEWS TICKERTAPE: Federal Investigators suspect… wait. What??? That’s not late-breaking. I was scrolling about it ALL LAST WEEK. I mean FOR CRYING OUT LOUD all you have to do is LOOK DOWN once in a while.