CUSTOMER: Hello, I’d like to cancel my dial-up internet account.
ALEX: I’m very sorry to hear that, sir. May I ask you if you were dissatisfied with the service in any way?
CUSTOMER: Strangely, no. It’s just that we’ve decided to use our cell phones as your primary phones and we no longer have a land line.
ALEX: Ubersoft is committed to customer satisfaction and we’d like to try to keep you as a customer. Could we convince you put off canceling your account by offering you a month of free service?
CUSTOMER: Well… no, you see, we’re using cell phones and we’ve disconnected our land line, so there’s no way for us to actually dial —
ALEX: Two months, then? How about sticking it out for two months of free service?
CUSTOMER: WE NO LONGER HAVE A LAND LINE.
ALEX: I can tell you’re an experienced negotiator, sir, which is why I’m prepared to offer you THREE MONTHS of free dial-up access.