STEVE THE PAPERCLIP: Oh, hallo there, Sport! How are you today?
SCOTT: Well to be perfectly frank, I’m feeling a little put off at the moment. I can’t help but notice that Alex, Monk and King all have iPhones. Even the Boss has an iPhone! What gives?
STEVE: Oh, that… nothing to worry about, Sport, I just needed to provide them with a little… incentive to get them to stop spreading discontent among our iPhone customers.
Yeah? Well I’ve been working support for the iPhone service plan just as long as the rest — where’s MY phone?
STEVE: Scott, I was bribing them because they were being dishonest! You were always trying to help your customers, not make them angry, so there was no reason to bribe you in the first place!
SCOTT: That makes no sense. If you reward them for being dishonest, what kind of incentive does that give the rest of us to stay on the straight and narrow?
STEVE: “Honesty is its own reward?”
SCOTT: I really hate my moral compass.