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Comic Transcript

CUSTOMER: Look, this is all very simple. The information in your database — the database that you sell to companies so they can verify my identity — is filled with things that are simply not true.

CUSTOMER: I didn’t die in 1975. I wasn’t arrested for grand larceny in 1983. I didn’t get married in 1988, and I don’t have four children!

CUSTOMER: Do you understand now?

ALEX: Yes, I think so.

CUSTOMER: Good. So how do I get it fixed?

ALEX: You don’t. All identities are final.

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