NARRATOR: Meanwhile, back at Ubersoft...
KING: Ubersoft Technical Support, King speaking. Can I help you?
CUSTOMER: I'm having a problem with my computer.
KING: What is the nature of your problem?
CUSTOMER: For the last two weeks, every morning when I'd boot up my computer it forced me to go through Nifty Doorway's product activation... so I'd drag out the serial number and punch it in... and then the next day, when I'd boot up again, I'd have to go through the same thing...
CUSTOMER: ...so this morning I boot up and it tells me I've run out of product activations, that I might be running pirated software, that I need to purchase a legal copy, and that my phone number and home address were sent to the FBI!
KING: Hm. I see the problem.
CUSTOMER: Thank God!
KING: It's not supposed to tell you that your phone number and home address have been sent to the FBI. The FBI are supposed to tell you that when they show up.