A Fairly Unholy Business Practice

Webcomic Storyline: 

Help Desk, by Christopher B. Wright

Comic Transcript: 

FEDS: Mr. Binky, I'd like to -

BINKY: Open a file?

FEDS: - no.

BINKY: - write a letter?

FEDS: - no.

BINKY: - run the spell checker?

FEDS: - no.

BINKY: - schedule a meeting?

FEDS: - no.

BINKY: - Create a mailing list?

FEDS: - no.

BINKY: - upgrade the software?

FEDS: NO.

BINKY: Well, you'll have to try our per-instance support line, Skipper, because I'm all out of ideas here!