FEDS: Hello, this is the Department of Justice... we're just calling to check up on a few things, and we'd like you to answer a few questions.
ALEX (thinking): Uh-oh.
FEDS: Has Ubersoft ever been involved in driving a competitor out of business through the use of force? Pre-announced software with no intention of releasing it on time? Used its position unethically to secure marketshare?
ALEX: No. No. No.
FEDS: Is the president of your company a demon from the Netherworlds fixated on gaining absolute power and consuming the souls of his servitors?
ALEX: Er... no.
BOSS: Who dares disturb my slumber, mortal bug?