An Open Letter to Apple
Dear Apple Sons of Bitches:
Mark Fiore, in case you weren't paying attention (or you had your collective heads so far up your collective asses that you were too comfortably ensconced in your collective cocoons to bother noticing) is a Pulitzer Prize winning cartoonist. Apparently he thought it would be a good idea to create an app for your iPhone, so that his fans could, I don't know, browse whatever it was he was doing from the comfort of their own battery-welded-to-the-chassis, walled-in-for-your-protection phone.
It's not a bad business decision, I guess. Unfortunately you geniuses pulled his app from your store. According to an article on Wired.com, you did so because it violated Section 3.3.14 from the iPhone Developer Program License Agreement:
Applications may be rejected if they contain content or materials of any kind (text, graphics, images, photographs, sounds, etc.) that in Apple's reasonable judgment may be found objectionable, for example, materials that may be considered obscene, pornographic, or defamatory.
Congratulations, Apple. You decided to come out against satire.
That's right: because Mr. Fiore is a cartoonist who makes fun of public figures-- pretty much the stock-in-trade of every humorist who comments on current events -- he is no longer welcome in the iPhone community.
Don't get me wrong, I know perfectly well that Apple is a company, not part of the government, and that therefore it has absolutely no legal obligation to meet any kind of standards for protecting free speech or opposing censorship. Technically you're not doing a damn thing wrong. On the other hand, you're still engaging in censorship, which in my book is a social evil that is damaging to the public good, which is why the government is constrained from engaging in it in the first place.
I've never particularly understood the iPhone "We Must Protect Our Racial Purity At Any Cost" model of App Store Cleansing, but this should be held up as your crowning achievement, because at the end of the day you assholes are selling a phone: a device that is intended to allow people to communicate with each other. While you can argue that iPhone applications are "other" things that are tacked on to the phone itself, you are selling a communication tool that blocks people from communicating with each other in specific ways and on certain types of content for the sole reason that you don't like it.
That's no kind of phone I would ever want to own... but that's not far enough for me. Despite the many problems I have with Steve Jobs, your current Lord and Master, I've always respected your products. The iPod, the Mac Laptops, yes, even the iPhone itself are marvels of engineering. But you've guaranteed that I'll never consider buying one again, not for myself, not for my wife, not for my daughter. If Apple is behind it, I want no part of it.
I won't be urging my readers to boycott your products. They're all individuals, perfectly capable of making their own decisions. But for my part, I guaran-damn-tee that I won't even use the iPod I already have.
Oh, and while I never intended to create an iPhone App to publish my comic, I'd like to gleefully point out that any iPhone App out there that can view my little comic is in violation of Section 3.3.14, since I have been known to satirize public figures, including -- gasp! -- Steve Jobs. So I recommend doing an immediate audit of your apps and disable any web-capable iPhone application, including the Safari browser.
Or, if you want to do it the easy way, just block these domain names:
- Eviscerati.com
- Eviscerati.org
- Eviscerati.net
- Ubersoft.net
- Ubersoft.org
That should take care of it. Now go back to doing whatever the hell it is you do. And try to get that block in place before Monday, because next week is going to be fun.
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Comments
Sadly, this action by Apple
Sadly, this action by Apple does not come as a surprise to me in the slightest. I've already noted in my own blog that Apple seems to be a Moral Guardian on the level of Disapproving Soccer Mom with an 8 Year Old Child - both in Apps and in the iTunes store, where I've yet to find a movie rated higher than PG-13. I've also found many major companies take a dim view to satire on the whole, and often will try to take steps to actively discourage it's use. The only one who's worse on that score, really, is governments, but, hey, maybe one day the world will be run by companies directly, and we can cut out the middleman. Right?
Sadly, I do have an iPhone. I freely admit, I love my evil little demon-spawned phone, because, as you stated, it's an amazing device (although I have some problems with it...) But the censorship and Moral Guardian-ness is one of the biggest reasons why I would never consider owning an iPad. It's also why I am frequently tempted to jailbreak my phone... although I've resisted, so far.
Sigh. I really want an iPad,
Sigh. I really want an iPad, and have been anxiously awaiting their arrival in Canada, but this goes too far. I knew they had gone to far with the adult stuff (guys, that is what ratings and parental controls are for), but I kinda passed if off as adult stuff is banned so often that I have become used to the affront. But, now, they have really gone to far.
But me writing a comment here is unlikely to help. The question is, how do I communicate my displeasure, and lack of purchase, to Apple? I'd like to let them know directly in clear, polite and non-hyperbolic terms that I'll not be buying an iPad until they start using ratings and let me decide what I want instead of them.
Censorship
It is amazing how there is so much media hype about China censoring individuals, however no one seems to care about Apple censoring a Pulitzer Prize winner's work or about the Australian government with a secret black list refusing to allow individuals to access web sites on their list. This is a new form of evil, worse than anything Microsoft or Google has ever done. I didn't think it wasw possible to be more evil than Microsoft or Google, well done Apple.
I have just cancelled my order for 20 Mac laptops and 30 Mac desktops for a new hotel. Lenovo now has the order. It's the only way I can have a say in what I feel is a very evil and stupid decision.
There's always the direct
There's always the direct route, that is, calling them, emailing them, or snail-mailing them. Their Contact page is fairly complete, actually, and a separate feedback page (http://www.apple.com/feedback/) you can use. Sadly, unless a lot of people contact Apple about this, they'll likely ignore any feedback about it, or at most, form-letter it.
The other option is to do like some people are doing, including me - spread the word, and convince people not to buy Apple's products, including the iPad. I've turned off a number of people already, for example.
Just to keep things current,
Just to keep things current, and in perspective:
I was told by someone who was following this story from the beginning of last week that as of last Thursday Apple had reconsidered, Mark Fiore has been asked to resubmit his app. I confirmed it this morning from a couple of independent news sources.
I'm not certain if this makes Apple's actions more or less defensible.
Alex
Well...
... it's definitely a good thing, but why did they have to be pressured to reconsider in the first place? In my opinion the fact that he was barred in the first place is an act of sheer idiocy.
What about "common carrier" status?
If Apple is deciding what content can or can't go over their device on non-technical grounds, shouldn't that threaten AT&T's common carrier status? Wonder if the EFF has considered that yet.
I think, most likely, because
I think, most likely, because the App Store (and apps bought therein) are third party, and completely optional, it won't reflect on AT&T's common carrier status. Further, since Safari can access pretty much anything you want, they can claim that there's no network discrimination going on. I doubt there's any legal pressure to be brought from that kind of angle.
Yeah...
... from a legal perspective they're not doing anything wrong... they can pretty much ban any app they want for any reason.
Ooooh!
We are a bit testy!
Be real... Pulitzer or no Pulitzer he is only a cartoonist... It is not as if he was a real person...
:-)
Good decision
Yes, because of this technology devices that we are into. We are tempted to go beyond our limits or try something( oohh! you know what i mean :)).
@John- good decision, " never consider owning an iPad"
resume writing